Author Archives: resilientspirit37

Ah, The Difference a Few Months Makes

The divorce has been final for a few months. I’m not going to pretend it was easy. There have been definite hits, including when our son found out his dad had been dating someone before we were divorced. It’s been … Continue reading

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The End? The Beginning?

February 15th he is moving out. I know I should feel happy, relieved. What I feel is deep sadness. I’m grieving for a life I thought I had…what I had hoped for. I’m heading to the lawyer next week and … Continue reading

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I hope it gets better.

Friends, I’m tired. Exhausted. I just keep hoping it gets better, but then things keep happening and I don’t see a break. No end in sight. First, he had another auto accident. Insurance dropped him…now his insurance is $450 a … Continue reading

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Ah, and so it’s time to plan the Divorce

It seems like I’m living in an alternate reality. I wake up at night, crying, anxious. I don’t sleep well. I’m trying to take herbal remedies to “fix” my sadness, depression, anxiety. I don’t know that I should be “fixed.” … Continue reading

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Why Do Things Come Back Up?

I really hate when something in the present triggers things from the past. My sister is having a baby. It brings up all of the memories of mine, which should be amazing, right? Yet, in the background are the memories … Continue reading

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Why am I so lonely?

I used to always crave alone time. I lived for time to decompress, read, sit in silence? Now? I still need it but it makes me cry. I cry at pretty much anything these days. The smallest thing one of … Continue reading

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Get Back on the Horse…

It seems that working full time and driving an hour each way is a bit more overwhelming than I remember. I’m thrilled to have a paycheck but I’m struggling with the balance of it. I suppose everyone struggles in this … Continue reading

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A Shift

It has been a while since I have updated you on my life, and I am taking a minute out today to share that I have finally landed a job. It has many good qualities, and I feel a sense … Continue reading

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This is No way to Live

Funny thing about all of this–I STILL hurt and struggle. I know in my heart he is not going to change. I wish he would; heck, I think somehow he wishes he would, but not enough to actually change. I … Continue reading

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Choices, Limbo, and Exhaustion

October will be a year of knowing this is not going to work. I’ve been living in this limbo state for that long. No wonder I can’t get past this depression. There has been zero forward movement. In fact, we … Continue reading

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